O.Live.People! [Online]
Looking for the heart fully alive
Considering Maturity
Mar 21st
Well, it’s official. I am blogging again, and I am doing so from my own website and linking it up to Facebook. Greetings Facebook friends! 
No lengthy post tonight. Just a thought that’s been on my mind recently considering the world view of “maturity”. To say that one is a “mature person” has a totally different meaning than the disclaimers on television: “Mature subject matter… viewer discretion advised.” It just seems awfully ironic to me that the very thing that is supposed to be the mark of adulthood (that is, maturity) is also the word used to describe some childish and/or foolish behaviours. Last time I checked, blowing somebody away in a video game is not mature. And it continues to baffle me why “mature” people would want to do that.
So much I could go on about. But in the promise to keep this short I’ll just throw out the thought: what’s so mature about “mature subject matter”?
Until another post: O live, people!
Location: Guelph
Mar 20th
Tonight I am in Guelph. I am in my room sitting on my bed. Probably blogging and chatting online while I should asleep instead. Soon enough that will come.
I am reading a super great book right now. Normally I wouldn’t go on too much about a book before I finish reading, but I have no concerns about this one. The book is called “Springtime Of The Soul” and it is written by Carole Hamm. Carole’s book came into our possession after a stay at her family run hotel in Lewisburg, PA last summer. The name of the hotel is the Country Cupboard Inn and each room has a complimentary copy waiting for each new set of visitors.
My mom devoured the book while we were there and many months later I am making my own way through it. The subtitle of the book is “A season of spiritual renewal and growth”. It’s a well timed read for me. I need something that is restorative and retreat-like in nature, as I have had to skip two retreat-type weekends in a row this month due to an annoying and nagging bug that just won’t let go.
My mom also has turned into a major supplier of sorts, circulating copies of this book to a number of others. And I see why now. I might just be finding myself doing the same in the not too far off future.
I don’t intend this blog post to be a book review. It is not organised or deep enough in nature to be that. But I do recommend this book already. And maybe I will launch into a book review? Who knows!
As for life in general, no recent trips but a few things coming up. And hopefully some other things worth mentioning at some point. But regardless, I hope to keep writing. I need to be doing this again. If nothing else, it will help later on when I’m finding myself farther afield.
Until the next time… O Live, People!
Have we “caught the vision splendid”?
Nov 20th
We have caught the vision splendid
Of a world which is to be,
When the pardoning love of Jesus
Freely flows from sea to sea,
When all men from strife and anger,
Greed and selfishness are free,
When the nations live together
In sweet peace and harmony.
(SA Songbook #833)
I sit in front of a screen a lot. I work in front of two of them. I go home and work, play, communicate in front of another one or two of them. I still watch TV from time to time. I’m not a big gamer, but I do enjoy a good game of Wii Sports or Guitar Hero. That’s a lot of visual, digital processing for my brain to handle in your average week.
Recently I have been pondering the draw to things digital and virtual. I’m confident that there are many papers written on the implications of our gazing into screens, including the addictive nature. I know I’ve proven it so in my own life, and in seems to be backed up with a lot of ammunition in the world around me.
In this recent pondering, I am particularly taken with the idea of the visual and “vision”. There was one time long ago that I remember playing real-life (actual cards!) solitaire SO MUCH that I actually dreamed about where to place the Jack. Such intense concentration maybe? Sure… but I also just plain played too much. However, I can recount a multitude of digitally influenced dreams and visions. Anything from dreaming about my programming assignments in university, to playing enough Guitar Hero (or any other video game) that I can close my eyes hours later and still see the fretboard with the notes coming at me. Sometimes not even needing to close my eyes….
Like I said, I am not a gamer. I have to choose not to be. I have too many already existing digital habits and addictions to cope with — I don’t need another one. But consider how much of the western population is taken with gaming. There’s some fun stuff, and a great deal of questionable and objectionable stuff… let’s just say I’m glad that my post-video game visions are of notes coming at me or bowling balls going down the alley and not wars and variations on the theme of depravity and iniquity. There is also a widely accepted demographic that makes up the majority of the gaming community – generally speaking, it is comprised of young males.
Joel 2:28 (KJV) reads:
And it shall come to pass afterward, that I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions:
I wonder what visions our young men are seeing? What dreams our old men are dreaming? What foundation sons and daughters have to prophesy on?
It got me to thinking, we sing “Be Thou my Vision”. We quote the passage from Joel that this prophecy comes from, and many of us hope that it belongs to us here and now. But I can’t help but wonder if what we are doing and allowing into our sight is blocking our ability to view visions – whether visions of God or from God. If our minds are so filled up with visions of things we shouldn’t be watching on the small or silver screens, if our minds are so over-actively engaged and distracted with video games even after we’re done playing them, if our view is less than clear… then mustn’t that indicate something about what we are absorbing in the natural life? The possible spiritual implications of all our digital and visual bombardment in the modern day should be a concern, if not outright alarming.
I have no answers beyond that which I know is true: anything that I am choosing in my daily life which deafens, blinds, or removes me from what God has for me is a choice that needs to be re-made.
Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.
Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.
Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.
Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.
High King of Heaven, my victory won,
May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all
The 1st day of the rest of my life
Nov 5th
So, I have hit a breaking point today.
I have harboured all sorts of stress and strain, tried to be super-duper-woman, gotten more and more bitter, and have just been plain tired and stupid with my time.
So here I sit stretched out in bed, having left work early. About ready to conk out for a little while, if at all possible. But as I type here and reflect on the last few weeks, I see how warped I’ve let myself become. And am actually thankful for the humbling experiences of my day, and hopeful that it isn’t too late to recover from my own bad habits.
I need to find the joy again…. I know where it is found, I just don’t know why I haven’t been looking! And that’s what this blog is supposed to be about! The joy, the glory of the heart fully alive in Christ. So right now I am not fully alive… not quite dead either, but the pulse has weakened as my focus has shifted. Let us renounce the weakening pulse and spring up with renewed joy and passion for the God we serve and the life He calls us to live in order to show His Son to others. After I have my nap, that is…. This is definitely a moment for a quiet time to allow Him to renew my spirit. Thank God for sleep and rest.
I am blogging-challenged…
Oct 2nd
Apparently, as great of an idea as this was to keep track of the journey, I haven’t been doing a very good job of it. I have loads of photos I want to share, and great stories to tell…. I just hope I remember them by the time I get blogging about them. I decided that I should carry on just the same from right now.
The original plan was for me to return home on October 3rd but it is looking like I will be staying until October 10th now. More details to follow.
Also, I just had a fantastic evening. A good meal (that wasn’t room service!), a nice conversation or two with family at home, a nice conversation connecting up with some Salvation Army officers down here, and then an in person visit with my friend who is staying down here. So very cool.
And now, it is time to sleep… perchance to dream… and hopefully not about the software I’m helping to test. 
Photos soon I hope…. and stories too… I really want to share!!
Giving Up
Sep 24th
Well, I tried to post photos on here, but tonight it is not working. I not only have my Texan Space Cow photo to share, but also I took some shots of the buildings downtown with damage. But alas they are not online yet.
Beyond that – how was my day? It was long. It started early and did not end early. But it was OK. Lots to learn and figure out, challenges to work through and around, etc. but that sounds about par for the course. Two more sleeps to my new hotel. Definitely looking forward to that.
Had a pretty unique supper meal – had some appetizers, including a chicken tortilla tomato soup, or something like that. But my main course was the culinary highlight of the trip thus far. It was maybe not something I would order again, but it was definitely worth trying and very enjoyable: parmesan-encrusted chicken, with spinach alfredo tortellini and a tomato mozzarella salad on the side. And the best part was that it was a normal portion size… or rather a Donna portion size. So I ate it all and enjoyed it. Yay!!!
Other than my supper meal, I am blanking on anything else interesting to say about Wednesday. So, onward to sleep. (Yay!) Hopefully I will have more luck with the photos tomorrow.
Good news all around
Sep 24th
1) Toilet fixed.
2) Food eaten.
3) Critical work done. (Not all work – boo… but enough…)
4) Going to bed now. Yes!!!!!
Toilets in Texas
Sep 23rd
Fortunately I have not needed toilets in Texas to puke yet… (nice way to start a post!) but I have become quite familiar with the inner workings of my hotel room toilet since it does not work properly. Thanks to various power outages and water issues back home over the years, I am quite equipped to handle the situation until somebody fixes it. (Not exactly high on their repair priority list with all the damage this place has sustained.) So, filling the tank manually with a garbage bin is where it’s at! Wuhhoo!
Saw my first Texan palm trees today. I think it was in the high 80s/low 90s today, not that I was outside very much. I wish I could be, it’s such great weather. (That’s 30s for all the Celsius fans!) Also saw lots of damage and cleanup… blown out windows in the downtown area, etc. Interesting.
The commute in from our way out hotel was crazy and heavy, although I’m sure the 401 back home is still far worse. I’m just glad I don’t have to do it daily anywhere. Things at the client are quite comfortable. The people seem nice. I just hope that I can be of use. I didn’t feel really brilliant today. Still there is talk of me possibly staying on longer than the planned dates, depending what happens. Crazy. I don’t think I feel ready for any of this. Definitely an experience to see all that I don’t know, yet again.
Was very glad for some of the Joyce Meyer talks on the TV (I heard some more this morning while ironing in a mad dash to get out) as they came in handy for me this morning. I’m trying to be much more mindful of myself, even when those around me aren’t necessarily. It’s amazing how many times I catch myself doing the very same things that I drive me mad.
Lunch was very nice… I had a chicken salad sandwich that had pineapple and pecans in it. Maybe not everybody’s thing, but I’ve always enjoyed that combo. So I was glad I picked that boxed lunch from the table. Hopefully they always provide lunch… If not, I’m gonna have to get really creative really fast.
So far that’s my biggest concern… not being able to eat. I am ALWAYS eating and snacking so this is weird. have eaten less in the last 24-48 hours than I care to say. Plus I am dead tired and a bit stressed, so that isn’t a great combination either.
I turned down the offer to go out for the business supper… I just couldn’t do it tonight. I have so much else to do, plus I really really need rest. I can’t afford the time, and since they didn’t need me, I gracefully (I hope!) bowed out. Hopefully I won’t need to turn them down every time. I’m sure that won’t look good. But I gotta take care of this bod plus be able to get work done when needed. I’m hoping that isn’t going to be necessary every night. :S
So, I just ordered room service… well not really, I ordered delivery. Hopefully it will be good, and hopefully I can snack on enough food to keep me going in the meantime. It could be as long as an hour wait before they get here. I hope it is hot – I can’t really do anything much with it if it isn’t.
I have company now… the maintenance guy is here to look at the toilet. He has already come and gone, but he left his stuff here and said he’d be back in a moment. Here’s hoping that I won’t be doing the manual fill for much longer!
Well, I should grab a granola bar and get working. Hopefully the food will greet the end of the worst batch of work I need to do. Then I can relax. Early morning… 8AM (yuck). Hopefully that means an early end to the day. But I’m not going to count on it. Here’s hoping I get some good rest… I need it. Big time.
Live From Houston!
Sep 23rd
I’m down in Houston, Texas for a few weeks on business. It’s already worth writing about.
I flew out with some fellow business trippers from Pearson Interational Airport (Toronto, ON) complete with a stretch limo ride from my door to the terminal. Things were pretty straightforward at the airport. No delays at security. The most interesting thing there was that my customs official had “GILLIGAN” on his name tag. It took everything within me to stay serious and not even crack a smile.
Toronto to Houston is a 3 to 3-1/2 hour flight, but our flight only had 16 passengers so that made things go a little more smoothly and quickly. A very uneventful flight — the way I like them! We headed down to claim our baggage only to be greeted by the Texan Space Cow (official name, unknown) which I took a photo of. I will have to put it here when I upload.
Other unusual things at the Houston Airport (George Bush Intercontinental) included the disposal areas in the restrooms for hypodermic needles, the “don’t be a victim/don’t talk to strangers” signs, and the idea that the rental car people really didn’t know where to circle our hotel on the map.
Once we got our vehicle (a very nice Suburban LT) we were on our way to the hotel. Should only have been a 15-20 minute drive. Was more like 1 to 1-1/2 hours since we definitely got lost, turned around, whatever. We were doing well following signs (which I am usually quite impressive at) but then I believe our great disadvantage was not our funny maps, or our bad directions from the rental car guy, but the missing signs here and there (usually at key places) as a result of Hurricane Ike. So our grand tour of Houston (in the dark, remember) took us through many neighbourhoods… many without power… many with damage.
On a lighter note, we found a coin laundry chain called the Washeteria. We saw a Burger King convenience store. (And just to complete the circle, we also saw a “Super Market Fast Food” store.)
The hotel we are staying in just re-opened today. In fact, it was a very good thing it did since the hotel we had our reservations with found they were unable to reopen in time. The people at the desk said that only part of the hotel is open, due to the damage sustained. That’s the story all over this city.
I’m having trouble connecting up with Salvation Army contacts here… and I’m hearing of more and more people say that they are coming down to help with the relief effort. The Army is definitely at work here. Who knows if I’ll be able to connect with any one or any corps at this point. But it’s early days here for me.
So in the morning I will be up and out for the first day on-site. Kind of scary. It’s a big company and my first time doing anything like this, but it’s good. I’ll be here with the others until Friday. Then I move hotels and stay for another week. At least. But one day at a time. Let’s meet the clients first, shall we?
Already I like TV here… maybe just because it was really late getting in to the hotel, but lots of Christian programming. Heard a super Joyce Meyer talk while I was unpacking some things.
Anyway, I had better get some rest. It is officially after 1am here now, so I am officially exhausted and looking forward to sleeeeep.
